Ralph opines on the subject of Bravery

Hello again!

Well, dear Reader (or possibly Readers, but I don’t want to sound overly optimistic), I must apologise for not gracing your computing devices with my writing for a while – simply put, I’ve not been quite myself.

You may recall from my last blog post that TOERAG (that’s an acronym for my male human) took me to the vet.  Unbeknownst to me, he and TOTCA (my female human) had been hatching a plan to take me back there again – reference my teeth!  Can you believe it?! I’ve been on this planet for over 12 years and now’s the time to start talking TEETH!!

Ralph The Brave One…

Perhaps you’re not aware that for a long time I’ve been known in my family as ‘Ralph The Brave One’.  This worthy title dates back some years, and I have earned it on many occasions.  For example, the picture at the top of the page shows me confronting a toad in Kent – as you can see, I’m the model of bravery-under-pressure here (albeit TOERAG himself eventually removed the toad from the tarpaulin whilst I ate his sandwiches for him).

On another occasion, TOERAG invited an entire pack of foxhounds to visit my farm in Kent.  He hadn’t given me prior warning of this invitation, so I was a little surprised to discover this large crew suddenly outside the tack room.  Somewhat taken aback at all the well-deserved attention I received from these tall chaps, my pelvic floor didn’t quite cope with the situation.  Possibly not my bravest encounter, but it still shows that I’m prepared to go where others fear to tread.  I have shared with you above a rather nice picture of the West Kent Foxhounds taken in 1931 (apparently before even TOERAG was born) – the most interesting canine being the one in charge: a brave Jack Russell Terrier of course!

Always being stoic…

Here at Stockham Farm on Exmoor, there are numerous incidents of my stoic behaviour to recount – regularly greeting the new dog friends that arrive here to stay in the Victorian Wing cottage and bring their humans with them; working hard on the digger to get the large pond ready for next year’s guests; and of course trying to get ahead with the renovation of the Piggery cottage so that more friends can come and stay in 2019.

As usual TOERAG wasn’t brave enough to investigate the contents of this dumpy bag, so I was sent it to have a look…

A second visit to the Vet…

However, a second visit to the vet in under a month is altogether another test of one’s bravery!  On arrival at the vet emporium I heard TOTCA chatting to someone about my teeth AND my gentleman’s cough (I can assure you I’ve never smoked).  Suddenly all the humans started faffing about and before I knew what was happening, I found myself waking up in a cage with a bandage on my leg (featuring cartoon pigs – seriously, not lions, but PIGS!!) and there was TOTCA standing there with water coming out of her eyes telling me I was brave and she loved me.  Obviously she looked ridiculous like that, so I had to lick her face clean to make her feel better.  Embarrassingly my tongue also went up her nose, but she was polite enough not to say anything.

Sometime later, I learned from Mother (when she reluctantly came to sit with me beside the Aga), that nothing had actually happened with my teeth but that I’d had what is called “an X-ray under General Anna’s thetic” and evidently General Anna had discovered I have “a heart condition”.  Well, I know of the Colonel who features in 101 Dalmatians, but I wasn’t aware of there being a General called Anna who’s also a Vet. Extraordinary!  Mother didn’t seem hugely bothered by my “heart condition” because apparently she has one too and what it means is that we get to have a pill every day which TOERAG tries to hide in a piece of cheese.  He thinks we don’t like the pill and just eat the cheese around it, so he has to give us more cheese to make us eat the pills.  Clearly he has no idea that we’re one step ahead and just enjoy seeing him getting fractious dispensing loads of cheese!

At the end of the day, dear Reader, you’ll be pleased to hear I was feeling much better and spent the next few days on the sofa recuperating.  Every cloud and all that…

Thanks for reading.  Do please follow me on Instagram if you’d like to: Ralph, Exmoor Jack Russell

Woof!